Sex was something I knew would happen, I knew he was sexually attracted to me as in a Oedipus complex, we were approaching the Genital stage where intercourse was an inevitability, a matter of when than if, and our denial was just building up, and it was this I was craving for, but I wanted it to be his move, to finally posses me and end my baron years. I awoke in a sweat as the morning sun streamed through my open d****s. I could hear the milk float and the bottle rattle as the milkman made his deliveries.I got up from bed and noted the damp stain in my sheet from my vaginal secretions, I had been wetting through the night, as my feverish brain, fantasized and fucked the night away in my head, and now as I stood naked in front of my bedroom window, watching the milkman approach closer to my home, I dared myself to let him see me.Instead I walked out of my room and down past my sons room, where I halted, turned back and went inside.I could see the dark shape lying beneath the duvet. I wasfunctional on sales calls and in meetings, but Iavoided unstructured time. I came home every eveningand plopped in front of the tube.Then I started to re-enter the atmosphere. And as Idid, it seemed to me that Laura was trying to read myeyes every chance she got. Was she interested?Was I interested? Well, yes I was. But I was stillstruggling with the fact that she wasn't really awoman. But what was a Real Woman? Was Diana a RealWoman? She had the biological parts, but I coulddiscern nothing soft, appealing or feminine about hernow. The more I thought about it, the more confusingit seemed. What is a woman? What is a suitablepartner? How do you know who is the real deal?Perhaps it was time I found out.Any I would think if anyone could understand me as Ireally am, Laura could.Besides, I went into business for myself because Iwould rather get results than live by someone else'srules that did nothing for me. Maybe it was time tostart applying the same mentality to the rest of.
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